I’ve Finally Found It!

Well, to be honest, I hadn’t looked very hard.

First, let me explain what “it” is.

“It” is an instrumental song that I remember playing on the radio when I was a teen. I remember neither a title nor a composer being named; I remember not caring, too. I think I just took for granted that this song — like a lot of other old grooves — would always be made available to me. Well, I got older, started using Youtube as my personal radio, then realized that I could find nearly every song my little heart desired to hear, except this one mellow-but-funky instrumental piece punctuated by a flute.

During the past five years, I’ve made it my business to try to eek out the rhythm to two people. Neither of them knew what the devil I meant.

About two years ago, I’d caught a remnant of the song as one of my ex-boyfriend’s uncle’s workers was listening to the radio and finishing a construction job. You shoulda seen my fool self.

“That’s it! That’s the song!”

Unfortunately, my ex was doing something just a bit more important than making sure I got my fix of nostalgia.

Anyway, about five minutes before I’d started keying this entry, I was thinking about a song from my childhood that re-emerged yesterday, and decided to give a search for this one a try. Without going into the whole ordeal, my query was “1990’s r&b instrumental song flute”. Wouldn’t you know it, there’s a whole thread about it, here: http://www.allthelyrics.com/forum/showthread.php?t=137115

Anyway, the song is called “Rain Forest”, by some guy named Paul Hardcastle. It’s not just some random thing I like; it’s a piece of my history, and it’s attached to feelings of long-abandoned hope and inspiration. Listening to this song speaks to the person I was before I developed a dystopic and nearly fatalistic view of life and the world. I need to be able to access the old parts of my soul that were hell bent on getting to the good stuff — before I learned to critically think and act. I’m hoping that recapturing that old hopeful place, then putting it in a bubble and staying in that, will protect me as I endure my tiring newness.

Enjoy,
Kenisha